Dating sites often match people up by their similarities, how compatible they might be because they hold the same likes and dislikes. That a successful and satisfying marriage is the joining together of two people who are very much alike.
This is a misconception. While there needs to be some common ground, a couple can have a good marriage while being very different, having diverse interests, and not thinking alike at all.
I know of a woman who was talking with a pastor about her marriage. “My husband loves to go out, take road trips, eat at interesting restaurants, enjoys movies, and even shopping. I am a homebody, love to cook and my idea of a fun night is reading at home and being cozy. He’s a liberal and I’m conservative. We don’t politically agree on much at all. He likes to entertain but I relish being alone. He loves sports and I could care less about who wins a game.”
As she spoke the pastor thought perhaps she was building a case for separation or divorce. That this wife was feeling a sense of “irreconcilable differences” and wanted out as the disparities with her husband were pronounced.
Instead she gushed, “How much I love this man. He’s just a fantastic husband. We may be different as night and day but this is what I’ve discovered. His strengths are my weaknesses and my strengths are his. We complement each other perfectly. I could not ask for a better husband.”
Postscript: Every word above I have to one degree or another personally experienced. Nobody could be more different than Nikki and me. But she has extended me so much grace, been so patient with me, and put up over and over with my blurted-out opinions. I’m convinced our differences have made our marriage better, for one simple reason. Patiently working through our differences has produced real love.
Walking through life with distinct differences; looks like a St. Louis Cardinal jersey on the left, and probably a San Francisco on the right
Prayer Focus This Week…
- Safe trip for Pastor Sam coming home later this week from Brazil
- Kristen Wilson facilitates a “Champions for Christ” Christian club at Oxford Academy where her boys attend. She needs a new sponsor teacher.
- Good News Clubs starting up soon at El Morro and TOW
- Local Mark Nelson, father of three young children, who survived a terrible accident last week; physical as well as financial recovery
- Memorial service for Elliot Miller, former assistant to Hank Hanegraaf of the “Bible Answer Man” radio program, held Saturday at our church; Elliot was a dear friend during the “Jesus Movement”
- For all the teachers in our church – elementary, high school and college, returning to the classroom for the 2018-2019 school year.
- Gil Dellinger, recovering from surgery
- Pastor Jeff’s surf trip to the Maldives with Chuck Brewer and Tom Berryman
Stay cool this week…Pastor Jay